New eyes

Quote from Marcel Proust

"A pair of wings, a different respiratory system, which enabled us to travel through space, would in no way help us, for if we visited Mars or Venus while keeping the same senses, they would clothe everything we could see in the same aspect as the things of the Earth. The only true voyage, the only bath in the Fountain of Youth, would be not to visit strange lands but to possess other eyes, to see the universe through the eyes of another, of a hundred others, to see the hundred universes that each of them sees, that each of them is; and this we do, with great artists; with artists like these we do really fly from star to star." from the fifth volume of Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust. 

Image via Pixabay

Proust mentions that the only true voyage, or journey, should only be undertaken with "new eyes." Our lives are a journey, a spiritual journey that can either stay stuck in one paradigm of thought which has been programmed into us since birth, or can meander about the universe,always seeing and learning new things. My journey has been of the meandering kind, as I started out as a Lutheran, became an agnostic in college, delved into Eastern religions for awhile where I learned about Ram Dass, and a long period as a Catholic where I had hoped to find out more about the Catholic mystics. I myself programmed my children in this viewpoint, which they hold to this day.

But I was born a seeker, and became disillusioned with the rituals and teachings of the Church. I became involved in some spiritual chatrooms on the Internet. I found a strong attraction to Wicca, a neo-pagan nature religion. I also met a man on one of these sites, and to my surprise and dismay of my family, found myself on a bus to meet him in California. We were together for almost 20 years, becoming legally married in 2006. We believed we are Spirit Mates and I was saddened when he passed over to the other side in 2017.

By that time I had become disillusioned with Wicca as well, feeling that it was more a role playing game that had become, within its ranks, very political and mean spirited.

So I went back on my spiritual quest and re-visited many of the authors and teachings I had earlier explored. This has been an on-going experience, and I suspect I have been on a life-long journey of spiritual awakening. I will not claim that I have become totally Conscious as I still find myself immersed in judgement, anger, and deep despair. Yet I find it easier to recognize when this has happened and am striving to look at the world and my life with different eyes.

I am now a widow living alone in a senior apartment in New Mexico. Since the Covid-19 outbreak I have been basically home bound, which has not been too much of a burden as I tend to be a hermit anyway. It has certainly given me a wealth of silence and alone time to try to embrace my true nature, Consciousness.

Thus I began to write the essay "Looking with Different Eyes" to explore in more depth my own feelings on topics of the soul, reality, ego, good and evil, and near-death experiences. If you have wandered this way, you might have read it. If not, I encourage to follow the link back to Looking With Different Eyes and then come back here to leave a comment. You are free to disagree  with me on any point, but I ask that you be kind. Comments that are derogatory or made in anger will be deleted.

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